Only The Broken Understand The Broken
by OutgoingIntrovert
Summary: Kyouya's suffering under the repeated abuse of his older brothers, and with no one to tell, who will understand him? How can he go on? Will a certain twin, dealing with his own familial issues, be able to help Kyouya? Can Kyouya return the favor?
1. Rude Awakening

**Wow! This is so exciting! I actually got around to starting a FanFic! I never thought it would happen, but here it is! I'm fairly sure this will be a multi-chapter story, but probably not too long.**

**I was randomly hit with inspiration yesterday when I was "doing my homework". -.-"**

**Whatever. PreCalc can wait!**

**Just so everyone knows, this will be a KyouKao fic, but Kaoru won't be in until Chapter 2. I just wanted to develop Kyouya's character a little bit first, then I'll do the same for Kaoru!**

**I babble too much. Without further ado, I give you chapter one of "Only The Broken Understand One Another"**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran… But whenever Bisco Hatori feels like giving it away, *raises hand tentatively***

* * *

><p>'<em>Honestly Kyou-chan, there's no point in trying to resist. You know we always get our way.'<em>

'_Don't worry Kyouya, we'll be gentle.'_

*RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING*

Kyouya awoke suddenly to the sound of four alarm clocks going off simultaneously. He had a pounding headache, but that was nothing new. He'd never been much of a morning person, and his resentment of early rising had only increased in the past few months. Today, though, he didn't mind so much.

He didn't mind so much today, because he wanted nothing more than to escape the nightmare that had plagued him the night before. The sadistic laughter of his brothers Akito and Yuuichi still rang in his head, relentless, taunting, invading. Turning to sit on the edge of his bed, he shook his head, hoping to clear the thoughts from his mind, to no avail.

Kyouya rose reluctantly from the warmth of his bed and made his way to the bathroom. He wondered if maybe he could wash the painful dreams away, if the ginger scented soap could mask the dirt he imagined covered his body.

Kyouya sighed and stepped into the shower at full blast, full heat.

'I wonder… If I take long enough, can get away with skipping breakfast? That way I won't have to face Father or Akito and Yuuichi'

His question was soon answered when just minutes later, his brothers appeared at his bathroom door.

"Kyouuuuuya, Father said he would like to see you before he goes into his study after breakfast. Jeez, what's taking you so long anyway?"

"Isnt it obvious Akito? He's clearly pleasuring himself" Kyouya could hear the smirk in his voice.

"But Yuuichi, I thought we took care of that last night! Kyou-chan, do you need us to come in there and finish you off?"

Kyouya gritted his teeth and tried to ignore the seductive taunts of his brothers as they echoed across the bathroom and his mind.

He tried to keep his voice steady, and had either of his brothers paid any actual attention to him, they would have heard the slight fear that hid behind his words.

"Tell Father, I'll be down momentarily. As for you two, you may leave now."

Akito relentlessly pressured Kyouya. "Are you sure otouto? You know how good we can be to you."

Kyouya could almost see the seductive glint in Akito's eyes and could imagine him dragging his tongue slowly across his bottom lip. He squeezed his eyes shut at the images and, more firmly this time, repeated, "You may leave. Now."

Yuuichi giggled callously as he and Akito walked away and called back to Kyouya, "Really now, don't take to long, or we'll be forced to come in and get you ourselves."

Kyouya switched off the water and slid down the wall of the shower until he was sitting on the ground. He suddenly felt nauseous, and dizzy. Was it because of his brothers? Was merely hearing their voices enough to physically ail him?

After stepping out of the steam filled shower, drying himself off, and dressing himself (smartly, as always), Kyouya returned to his bedroom and searched for an aspirin.

It was saddening to how much he relied on those little pills to help him through each day. The Otoris were supposed to be strong. He shouldn't need that. Just as Kyouya sat the pill back down, the sound of Yuuichi's voice reached his room again.

"Kyouuuuyaaaaa!"

Kyouya quickly popped the pill into his mouth, grabbed his notebook and made his way towards the stairs.

* * *

><p>As he left his room, a maid came seemingly out of nowhere and immediately began cleaning his room. Not that there really was anything to clean. As always, Kyouya's room was practically spotless, leaving the maid an easy job. It was custom of the Otoris to leave a clean trail behind them, even within their own home.<p>

Kyouya chuckled drily to himself at the irony. It was custom to stay clean, yet because of his brothers, he was anything but.

"Kyouyaaaa! Are you just going to stand there laughing to yourself or are you coming to eat?" Akito called loudly

Trying to gain some form of composure, Kyouya took a deep breath before following his older brother into the dining room.

The moment he stepped into the room, he was greeted by one of his family's countless maids.

"Good Morning, Master Kyouya, what would you like for breakfast this morning?" she asked shyly with her head bowed.

Kyouya had always been amused by the apprehensive nature most people developed around him. He was, after all, the Shadow King. He quickly turned on the cool but polite charm for which he was well known for among the members and clients of the Host Club.

"Ah, Good Morning to you as well. You needn't worry yourself with the preparation of my breakfast. Please, I'll just have some tea."

He topped the act off with his famous intimidating, but also intriguing smile.

The maid blushed under his glance and replied a quick, "Yes, Master Kyouya" before hurrying embarassedly out of the room.

Kyouya smiled to himself. It just never got old. He'd have to try and remember her name, it would make the whole act that much better.

"Good Morning, Kyouya." his father adressed him promptly

"Good Morning Father."

"Do you have any major exams coming up in school today?"

"No Father, none that I can recall."

"Hmm. Did you sleep well?"

That was his routine. Kyouya's father would ask him all the customary questions that a father SHOULD ask, but not because he really cared. What mattered most to the senior Otori was not what went on in Kyouya's life, but whether or not his life was even comparable to the seemingly perfect lives of his brothers.

"Well, I stayed up until 4 balancing several of our major accounts, so no, I can't say I slept well, but I did, however, accomplish quite a bit.

The Suohs owe us a small sum, but I will recieve that from Tamaki today."

His father beamed, obviously pleased with what Kyouya had done, and returned to his breakfast with a content grunt.

The maid, (Renate! That was her name!), soon returned with Kyouya's tea.

"Thank you, Renate." he said, glancing up at her over the tops of his glasses.

"Um, it was my pleasure Master Kyouya!" she blushed furiously and bowed before scurrying out of the room yet again.

Kyouya sipped the hot liquid slowly before setting the tea down with a refreshed sigh. Looking up, he noticed that Yuuichi and Akito were staring at him.

Sensing his sudden discomfort, the two older Otori brothers smiled sensually at Kyouya, further deepening feeding the unsettling feeling that had developed in the pit of his stomach.

Akito very seductively licked the spoonful of yogurt he was holding, while Yuuichi made a big show out of the banana he was eating, licking up the sides, and pushing just the tip into his mouth before closing his eyes and taking a slow bite.

Some how, their father remained completely oblivious to the whole situation and carried on eating his bacon as he read the news.

Unable to handle the tension, Kyouya stood suddenly, and apologized to his father.

"Gomen Father, but I've just remembered that I promised Tamaki that I would be at school early today to help him with a few assignments."

"Don't forget his payment, son."

"Of course Father."

Just as he thought he'd gotten away from the antics of his brothers, Kyouya heard the distinct sound of footsteps behind him.

He whirled around to face his brothers only to find Akito's arm snaked around his waist.

Kyouya felt his face go warm as Akito pulled him closer into the embrace.

"Otouto, would you like me to take you to school? I feel like we don't spend much quality time together anymore." Akito breathed into his ear.

"N-no, Akito, it's fine, I'll just take a limo."

Another pair of arms found their way around Kyouya, as he discovered That he was now sandwitched between His older brothers.

"Kyou-chan, do you not want to spend time with us?" Yuuichi murmured into his neck, smiling into his skin.

Kyouya closed his eyes involuntarily, but only for a moment as he became more aware of the situation. He needed to get out. But it didn't seem as though either Akito or Yuuichi was going to make that easy for him.

The older brothers ran their hands across Kyouya's body. Externally, his body reacted to the stimulation his brothers were providing, letting out soft moans and gasps, but in the inside he was screaming, begging for a way out, for a rescue.

Finally, he gained enough resolve and courage to break free of his brothers and face them.

"I need to go." he said shakily, struggling to maintain his cool disposition, but his brothers weren't fooled.

"Have fun at school, Kyou-chan!" they chanted in harmony, their voices a perfect blend that sent shivers down Kyouya's spine.

He turned and walked out to the limo that took him to Ouran Academy each day. He couldn't be more grateful for the solitude it provided for him, and relaxed into the back seat, feeling more alone than he had for a long time.

Kyouya opened his notebook and began scirbbling, distracting himself with the finances of the Host Club.

He was slowly able to push the thoughts of his brothers out of his mind, if only for a little while. He knew they would return eventually. They always did.

Kyouya sighed and leaned further into his seat.

'Today is going to be a long day…'

* * *

><p>Eep! Okay there it is! Was it terrible? I hope not.<p>

Constructive criticism is much appreciated, and any feedback at all is okay really!

Just keep in mind that this is my first fic ever, so don't be too harsh, I'm still learning :D

R&R!


	2. ANOTHER Rude Awakening

'Kaoru, you know I'd never leave you, don't you trust me? You do, don't you Kaoru?'

"Kaoru? Kaoru! Come on, get up!"

"Mmmmmhmmph"

"You asked for it," a soft voice mumbled.

Kaoru Hitachiin suddenly found himself painfully thrust off the bed and onto the floor. Angrily, he shot an annoyed glance toward his brother, who smiled back mischeviously.

"What a way to be woken up. Thanks a lot Hikaru." Kaoru rubbed his backside, still not fully recovered from the rude awakening.

"I'd been calling your name for like 5 minutes already! What else was I supposed to do?"

"There aren't any options other than shoving me out of bed?"

Hikaru merely shrugged. "Well, it's certainly the quickest way."

Kaoru rolled his eyes at his twin and made his way toward the shower. He noticed that he was limping slightly from his impact with the floor; that would probably continue for a while. He hadn't made it very far before he found his hand intertwined with another's, as Hikaru pulled him into an intimate embrace.

"Hey, Kaoru, I'm sorry, okay? Really I am."

Kaoru refused to meet his brother's eyes. "That will probably bruise, you know."

Hikaru caught Kaoru's chin, forcing him to look into his eyes. He held him under a scrutinizing gaze, causing Kaoru's face to grow warm.

"I'm sorry, I forget sometimes, you are the more delicate of the two of us."

Hikaru ran a finger up the side of Kaoru's face, then cupped it with both hands, one thumb resting softly on Kaoru's bottom lip. Hikaru slowly dragged his thumb across the lip and leaned closer to whisper into his brother's ear.

"I've really got to be more careful with you."

Kaoru sighed and pulled out of his brother's clutch. He loved Hikaru, probably much more than a brother should, but he couldn't handle it when he acted like this. It was so hard to tell what his brother's motives were. Did he act out of brotherly love, or love of a different kind? It had been hard for Kaoru to come to terms with these feelings for his brother, and facing him in a situation like this, trying to read his actions, only made things more confusing, more unbearable.

Unwilling to even try to figure his brother out, Kaoru pushed past Hikaru, sending him one last resentful glance.

The older Hitachiin looked at his brother with concern and watched as he sauntered to the bathroom.

Once there, Kaoru leaned over the sink and stared into the mirror.

If he didn't know any better, he easily could've thought he was Hikaru. He could perfectly imitate his voice and knew all of his idiosyncracies. It was no wonder no one could tell them apart, they really were identical. Not even their own mother had quite been able to do it, and their father, The Ghost, certainly hadn't been able to.

Not that they'd really needed to anyway. The twins had been joined at the hip from day one, so identifying them as "Hikaru and Kaoru" had always sufficed.

It was from this inseparable bond they shared that Kaoru's unhealthy dependency on Hikaru had spawned. His brother had always been the dominant one in their relationship, coming up with all their pranks and speaking for Kaoru when he felt it necessary.

And of course, he was the one who'd invented the "Which One is Hikaru?" Game. The game that had so distanced them from everybody else.

'I wonder how different thing would be, if we'd never even started that stupid game...'

Kaoru was jolted out of his thoughts by the sound of Hikaru knocking on the bathroom door.

"Get on with it will you! I've got to shower too!" Hikaru called impatiently.

"There are plenty of other bathrooms to use Hikaru." Kaoru replied unfazed.

"Yeah? Well this is my favorite one!"

Kaoru ignored his brother and started the shower, turning it all the way up, causing the room to steam almost immediately.

As he washed himself, Kaoru became aware of a large blackish-blue bruise forming on his hip. It actually hurt pretty badly. Not much of a surprise, Kaoru was the weaker of the two.

'Man, if I'd only woken up when the alarm went off, then I never would've gotten this bruise.'

Kaoru was struck with the realization that even though it was Hikaru's fault, he just couldn't bring himself blame him. He'd never been able to.

He'd taken the fall for his brother countless times, and never thought twice about it. He just loved Hikaru too much.

Kaoru smiled sadly to himself as he turned off the water, and returned to the room he and Hikaru shared. There, he found his brother already dressed in his blue Ouran uniform.

Hikaru stood and walked over to Kaoru.

"What took you so long bro? I've been waiting for like half an hour."

"I don't know, I just really needed to clear my head." Kaoru replied non-committedly, unwilling to attempt describing what was really going on inside his head.

Hikaru's gaze shifted from mild annoyance to concern immediately.

"Is something wrong? You can tell me anything. Don't you trust me? You do, don't you Kaoru?"

Kaoru froze as the words from his dream replayed themselves over and over again.

"Kaoru? You do trust me, right?"

Kaoru opened his mouth to speak, but found that he couldn't, and settled for nodding his head. A small part of him hoped that Hikaru would understand without him having to say a single thing. It hoped that somewhere deep down, Hikaru would feel the same way. But his heart told him this would never be, and that to tell Hikaru the truth would only succeed at distancing them, severing the bond they'd shared from day one.

On any normal day, Hikaru wouldn't have let this go so easily, but today was different. He just stared off into the distance and returned his brother's nod.

"Good. Don't forget that... Hey, I've got some stuff to take care of before school, so I'm just gonna go ahead, alright?"

Kaoru, still unable to speak, nodded dumbly again.

"Cool, I'll meet you there later then."

And with that, Hikaru walked out of the room without so much as a look back.

Kaoru finally regained some sense, enough to recognize the sadness welling in him. Hikaru hadn't tried to figure out what was going on with him. He'd never not cared before, Hikaru would always relentlessly pester Kaoru, begging him to share his feelings, sometimes, he'd even cry in desperation, but not today. Today, he'd walked away like he'd never even noticed anything was wrong in the first place.

After a moment more in the uncomfortable silence, Kaoru dressed himself, identically to how Hikaru had, and headed downstairs.

Upon entering the kitchen, Kaoru ran into his mother who draped her arms around him dramatically.

"Ah, Good Morning Hikaru, my little fashion protégé! Come! You simply MUST see some of my newest designs!"

"Um, sorry mom, I'm Kaoru, not Hikaru."

"Ah, I'm sorry darling, when you see Hikaru at school, could you tell him I could use his GENIUS input on a few of my new designs?"

Without waiting for a response, Kaoru's mother kissed him on the forehead and walked away, returning to her studio.

Kaoru sighed. This wasn't really something he should be surprised about. Hikaru had always been a little bit better at everything. If Kaoru scored a 99 on a test, Hikaru scored perfectly. Whatever gave Kaoru a bruise, barely even made a mark on Hikaru. The same went for their designs. Whatever Kaoru designed, Hikaru took and made 10 times better. It was just the way things were.

Even though he was hungry, Kaoru didn't feel much like eating and ignored the maid who came to find out what he wanted breakfast.

He was still trying to get a grasp on the way Hikaru was acting. Not only that, but he was also trying to make sense of the dream he'd had the night before. Kaoru was thinking himself in circles, ultimately ending up nowhere. His mind was sufficiently tired out.

Kaoru was just about to decide whether or not he could get away with faking sick. School was the last thing on his mind; he highly doubted he'd be able to focus in class, especially when Hikaru was only a seat away… His thoughts were interuppted when his cell phone lit up with a text from Hikaru.

'Hey! Haruhi invited me to go shopping with her after Host Club. Don't wait up for me, okay?'

Kaoru closed his phone without responding. It's not like Hikaru would have cared either way.

He put his head in his hands, and rested for a moment before calling a limo to take him to school. At least he'd have the 15 minute drive to school to collect himself and put on an act that everyone would fall for.

While he waited, his phone lit up, another text from Hikaru.

'On second thought, come with us! You need to be more social anyway."

Kaoru seethed. _HE _needed to be more social? Hikaru was the one who'd lost it when Haruhi had reconnected with her old friend, Arai. Hikaru was the one who was constantly played pranks on and blatantly insulted people. Kaoru had only followed suit out of pure love and admiration for his brother. Kaoru couldn't ever say no to him.

Once again, his thoughts were interrupted, this time by a maid who'd tapped him on the shoulder.

"WHAT." He snapped at her, still livid from Hikaru's text.

"Eh! Sorry Master Kaoru, but your limo is here!" the maid responded hastily, pointing out the window.

Kaoru glanced unenthusiastically in the direction she'd pointed, seeing that the limo was indeed there. He gathered his things and made his way to the limo silently, not wanting his anger to get the best of him.

He attempted to pull himself together on the ride to school, like he'd planned, only to find that with each passing minute, his anger was escalating.

It grew and grew until finally, Kaoru broke down in tears.

Did Hikaru really think he was anti-social? _WAS _ he anti-social?

"Master Kaoru, we have arrived."

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Thanks."

Kaoru wiped his face with a handkerchief he pulled from his uniform pocket and stepped out of the limo.

He took a deep breath as he walked toward Class 1-A.

'Today is going to be a long day.'


	3. An Odd Encounter

Oh. My. Goodness. I can't believe it's been so long since I updated D:

I was supposed to do it a week ago, but I've been grounded, and actually had to sneak on to post this chapter

And even better, I'm going to Jamaica for 10 days, SO I'm not entirely sure whether or not I'll be able to update. I'll definitely keep writing though.

Also, I'm probably going to rewrite this chapter, because I wrote the whole thing on my iPod "Notes" so I'll bet it's full of typos, and I think I left out a few things. .

:( Oh well.

**Disclaimer: Don't own Ouran or anything like that. Too bad...**

Kyouya had been sitting in class 2-A for quite some time. He enjoyed the solitude before school, before the classroom became loud and crowded from all the other second years. It was during this time that Kyouya could get a little extra work done, or on a bad day, catch up on some sleep. That was rare though, he wouldn't allow his image to be tainted. But today, Kyouya was a bit beyond caring about his image. All he really wanted to do today was rest. He still wasn't over how his brothers had acted this morning. It just wasn't like them. Kyouya could handle the taunts, the looks, but it had gotten so physical, it caught him by surprise, and it had scared him. But at the same time, it hadn't felt bad, in fact it actually felt... Good?

Kyouya groaned and put his head on his desk. Now really wasn't the time to think about this.  
>Luckily, at that moment Tamaki came bounding into the classroom with the same eccentricity as always.<br>Kyouya had never been so relieved to see his friend; he quickly pushed all thoughts of his brothers and focused his attention on Tamaki.

"Good Morning Kyouya!"  
>Kyouya pushed his glasses up slightly and smiled politely.<p>

"Hello Tamaki, how are you this morning?"

"I would have been perfectly fine, but I saw those devilish twins outside with Haruhi! They're going to corrupt my poor innocent daughter, I just know it!" Tamaki stared dramatically off into the distance, worrying needlessly.

Kyouya gazed distractedly at the blond, wondering absently when Tamaki would realize his true feelings for Haruhi. It was so obvious to everyone except him and her. The thought made Kyouya chuckle quietly to himself, but the laugh hadn't passed  
>Tamaki. He whirled around, looking exasperated.<p>

"Mother! There's nothing funny about those two getting to our precious Haruhi, so why are you laughing?"  
>Kyouya just smiled. "You'll figure it out in time Tamaki. Now, about that payment you owe me..."<p>

Kaoru's POV

Kaoru had been scowling at his desk for about 30 minutes straight. Even worse, Hikaru hadn't even noticed. The two Hitachiins were almost always perfectly in sync, finishing each others sentences and such, but Hikaru hadn't looked his way once, not since early this morning.

Kaoru stole a glance at the older twin. Hikaru was busy trying to flirt with Haruhi, who as usual, wasn't paying him any attention, at least not in the way he desired.  
>Kaoru sighed softly, folding a bit more into himself. He'd just begun to wonder how it could get any worse when a voice shook him out of his thoughts.<p>

"Hitachiin Kaoru! Please stop disturbing Ms. Fujioka."

"Oh right, sorry Sensei." Hikaru replied.

Kaoru shot a deadly glare in his brother's direction. Hikaru responded only with a half heart shrug and a smirk as if to say "What can I do? We're identical."  
>Kaoru resumed staring at his desk. How could he have fallen for someone like this. For someone so selfish? Why couldn't he bring himself to call his brother out.<br>Because he was afraid. Afraid that if he did anything to Hikaru, he might lose him forever. He couldn't imagine life without his brother, without his other half. The worst part was, Hikaru could easily live life without him.

The more Kaoru thought about his older brother, the more depressed he became.  
>'I wonder what I would have to do, to get him to care again. Half the time he acts so intimate, the way we used to, when we were younger. Before SHE came along.'<br>Kaoru shook his head. No. This wasn't Haruhi's fault, she was his friend, he couldn't think of her like that, as an obstacle. She hadn't purposely put herself between them. Hell, she didn't even KNOW she was coming between them.

Kaoru hadn't realized the tears welling in his eyes until they were moments away from spilling. He wasn't the only one who'd noticed, Haruhi was looking at him, her gaze filled with concern.

"Hey Kaoru? You don't look so good, maybe you should step out for a bit."

Kaoru looked up at her and nodded.

"Yeah I think I will. Thanks"  
>Kaoru excused himself from the classroom and made his way to the bathroom.<p>

Kyouya's POV

It had been a boring class, moreso than usual. Kyouya's dad had given him almost the exact same lecture 2 years ago. It really wasn't any fun to learn the same thing twice, he would've much rather been in German or perhaps English. Languages were much more interesting and provided a bit of challenge, exactly what Kyouya needed at this point. Actually, he'd take any form of distraction rather than learn derivatives again.

Kyouya gazed out the classroom door, hoping to find something to amuse him, at least for a little while.  
>Coincidentally, it was at that moment that one of the Hitachiin twins walked by.<br>'Ah, they must be pulling a prank of some sort. This could be amusing.'  
>"Excuse me Sensei, may I be excused for a moment?"<br>Kyouya gazed charmingly at his teacher over the rims of his glasses and flashed an award winning smile.

"Um well, I suppose you may, but only for a little while Mister Ootori."  
>Kyouya nodded a polite reply and left the room.<p>

Once outside, Kyouya glanced around, searching for the wandering twin. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of auburn hair heading into the bathroom at the end of the hall.  
>Kyouya was perplexed. Even when they were playing pranks, the twins were inseperable. So why were they now?<br>His curiosity peaked, he follwed the younger boy into the bathroom.

"Alright, what are you up to?" Kyouya asked with mild interest.

The younger boy whirled around angrily.  
>"Up to? What the hell are you talking about? I'm not up to- Oh, Kyouya-senpai, sorry."<p>

"Kaoru? What are you doing out of class?"

Kaoru looked down sheepishly glancing up at Kyouya through his bangs.

"Oh, I just needed a break I guess. Wait, you called me Kaoru? How do you know I'm not Hikaru?" He asked defiantly.

Kyouya stepped closer until he was just inches away from Kaoru. Despite the two being almost the same height, Kyouya had a distinctly larger build than Kaoru. He took Kaoru's chin in his hand and stared directly into the younger twin's topaz eyes. Kaoru leaned back slightly and flushed at the contact.

"You know," Kyouya began, "Despite what you may think, you and your brother are very different. And YOU are definitely Kaoru."

He stepped back, crossing his arms and looked at Kaoru expectantly. "Well, am I right?"

Kaoru looked back at him and nodded slightly.

"Yeah, you're right." He turned back toward the sinks and stared into the mirror.

"Although, I've got no idea how you could have possibly figured that out. And it's not like it matters anyway, Hikaru's growing apart from me, there won't be any need to tell us apart anymore, it'll be obvious."

Kaoru felt the tears welling up in his eyes. He didn't even have the energy to be embarassed about the fact that he was about to cry in front of Kyouya, the Shadow King.  
>He slid down the wall, now sitting on the floor, his head in his hands.<p>

"God, I'm such an idiot." he whispered.

Kyouya stared down at the younger boy. He was suddenly struck by how vulnerable Kaoru looked in that moment. Without his brother by his side, he looked helpless, lost, alone. Kyouya was overcome by a strong feeling of sympathy. He sat down across from Kaoru, propping his arm up on his knee and gazed at the smaller boy.

Kaoru had tears running down his face, his topaz eyes were rimmed with red. He was in obvious misery, and Kyouya wanted to know why.  
>He pushed his glasses up on his face, and spoke quietly.<br>"Kaoru, there's something going on here, and I know to you, I may just be the 'Shadow King', but I am a person too. If you need to talk to someone, I'm here for you."

Kaoru glanced up, and for a moment, topaz met black and a mutual understanding passed between them. For some reason, Kaoru knew he could trust Kyouya. He gave Kyouya a small smile, but as quickly as it had appeared, it vanished. He stood up slowly.

"But why would you want to know any thing about me? I'm not even worth getting to know. If you know Hikaru, you know me as well. I'm just a lesser replica of something great."

Kyouya stood as well and gazed fiercely into Kaoru's eyes. He approached the young twin until there was barely any space between them.  
>"Kaoru, do you really believe that, that you're just a replica?"<p>

Kaoru hesitated, still shocked at the growing intimacy of the situation. He was sure it was unintentional, but Kyouya was awfully close..  
>"I-I don't know, that's just the way it seems. He's always better at everything than I am."<p>

Kyouya sighed," I know it's hypocritical of me to say, but you can't think of yourself as worthless, you're special Kaoru, more than you know."

It was Kaoru's turn to inquire.  
>"Hypocritical, how so?<p>

Kyouya turned away, looking... embarassed? Kaoru hadn't thought he'd ever see an emotion like that make itself evident on Kyouya.

"Kyouya," He began.

The older boy glanced back at Kaoru, but only for a second.

"Its, nothing... Just, don't be too hard on yourself, okay? I'll see you after school."

He walked out of the bathroom, leaving Kaoru with nothing but his own thoughts.

'I guess I'm not the only one with secrets...' Kaoru gazed thoughtfully in the direction Kyouya had left.  
>He sighed, remembering Kyouya's words:<p>

'Don't be too hard on yourself, okay?'

"I'll try Kyouya, for you."

* * *

><p><strong>Mehhhhh. I'll definitely need to work on this some more. My writing skills have deteriorated.<strong>

**I'll do better, I promise!**

**Please review!**


	4. Mixed Signals

Kyouya slipped silently back into the classroom and into his seat. He looked down at his desk, the bathroom events finally taking the time to sink in. Kyouya wasn't used to showing that kind of sympathy. The Shadow King was supposed to be menacing, not understanding... So why had he been?

There had just been something about Kaoru, the way he had looked so vulnerable, just sitting there as he cried for that which he could never have. It had set off something inside Kyouya, compelled him to help the younger boy because in fact, it appeared they weren't too different at all. They were both hiding struggles that clawed at their hearts each and every day. They hid them from everyone around them in an attempt to keep up appearances. But there was more to Kaoru's story, and Kyouya had full intention of finding out what it was.

"Kyouya!" Tamaki's sing-song voice pulled Kyouya from his internal inquiries. "Where did you disappear off to? It's not very nice to ditch people like that you know."

Tamaki had only been joking, but upon seeing his friend's seriousness, a much different kind then he would normally see on Kyouya, he immediately softened.

"Kyouya? Are you alright? You seems bit troubled."

Kyouya glanced at the blond.

"Hmm? Oh, no. I think I'm alright. I just ran into Kaoru is all."

"Ah, one of the devilish twins," Tamaki joked with a glint in his eyes.

"Well, I wouldn't call Kaoru the devilish kind. He's got quite a bit more depth than his brother. It's actually rather intriguing."

"Intriguing? A Hitachiin? There's not much to know about them is there? Or, they don't really choose to reveal much, and that's fine, right? We get along." Tamaki said, rather dimissively.

Kyouya bristled at the comment and lashed back quickly.

"Tamaki, doesn't it bother you that you've known those two for about 3 years, and they're supposed to be close friends of yours, yet, you know next to nothing about them personally?"

Tamaki started at Kyouya's suddenly harsh tone. This wasn't like Kyouya, not in the slightest. He'd never seen his friend act so protective and defensive of anyone or anything, other than his reputation that is.

Kyouya held eye contact with Tamaki, daring him to challenge what he'd said.

"Well?"

"Um, I suppose you're right." Tamaki studied his friend carefully, still confused as to where this attitude had spawned from.

Kyouya turned away from Tamaki's scrutinizing eyes and tried to at least look as though he was paying attention to the lesson, but Tamaki's stare was relentless.

After a moment, Tamaki spoke again, this time in a softer, more understanding voice.

"Kyouya, that was quite unlike you. I've never seen you act like that before about anyone. What's going on?"

Kyouya continued to stare forward, his head resting on one hand. He didn't know. He didn't know what was going on.

But whatever it was, he couldn't let it dominate him, not when there were so many other things he needed to focus on, like the Host Club, and his father. Then there was the matter of his brothers...

"Tamaki, I can quite honestly say, I haven't the slightest idea."

Kaoru walked back into class and took his seat next to Haruhi. She turned to him and whispered quietly,"Are you feeling better?"

Kaoru looked off thoughtfully for a moment then returned Haruhi's gaze.

"Yeah, I think I am." he smiled lightly at her and she returned the gesture, before turning back to her work.

Kaoru would've been working as well, but, he had too much to think about. He almost didn't believe what had just happened was real. Kyouya wasn't the type to be so openly caring and wise, that was usually Tamaki's role. And yet, there he'd been, sitting on the floor next to Kaoru, comforting him. It was... Weird, but a good kind of weird. Kaoru hadn't minded at all.

But it was still really out of character for him, for both of them actually.

Kaoru always played his part of the cheeky, mischevious twin, a role that hadn't ever failed him, until his feelings for Hikaru had grown. And his growing feelings had coincided with Hikaru's growing feelings for Haruhi. It was a Teufelskreis, as the Germans say, a devil's cross, a vicious cycle. Neither of them would ever get what they want.

A paper ball to the face shook Kaoru out of his thoughts. He unfolded it and found a note from Hikaru:

'Hey, you took a pretty long time in there, what's up?"

Kaoru rolled his eyes. 'Now he decides to care.'

He scrawled back a quick response, not really wanting to entertain his brother's antics.

'Just needed some air.' He paused before continuing, unsure whether he should mention what had happened with Kyouya. His pen hovered momentarily over the paper. Hikaru had said he could tell him anything hadn't he?'Talked with Kyoya for a bit.'

He tossed the note back effortlessly. Moments later, it landed on his desk again.

'Kyouya? Why were you talking to him? Was he trying to manipulate you or something? You know how he is.'

Kaoru fumed. He couldn't talk Kyouya, but Hikaru was free to flirt with Haruhi as he pleased. Right. Because that made a lot of sense.

'Why do you even care? We were just talking. It wasnt about business deals or anything like that, just life. Not that mine matters to you though.'

That one had been a little harsh, but Kaoru was feeling harsh. Hikaru wasn't being fair. Now all Kaoru wanted to do was wake him up. Open his eyes a little bit. Maybe then he'd get the message.

Kaoru could feel the hurt stare of his brother as he opened the note.

At that moment, the bell rang, signifying the class change. Kaoru tried to leave and avoid his brother, but Hikaru stood right in front of him, and waited for the teacher and the rest of the class to leave.

They stood in silence for a moment, Kaoru refusing to meet his brother's searching gaze.

"Kaoru," Hikaru took a slightly hesitant step forward and as much as he willed himself not to, Kaoru found himself looking into his brother's eyes.

"Kaoru you can't really mean that. You think your life doesn't matter to me?" Hikaru took another step forward and snaked an arm around Kaoru's waist, pulling him closer.

Kaoru sucked in a quiet breath. It was happening again.

Hikaru ran a finger down Kaoru's face. "Thats insane and you know it."

Kaoru couldn't find his voice. He never could when Hikaru was acting like this.

The older twin pushed the younger softly against the wall, meshing their bodies together. Hikaru took Kaoru's chin in his hand, and pulled his face close, until they were just milimeters apart. He looked into his eyes and whispered, his breath caressing Kaoru's lips.

"You know I love you more than anything."

Hikaru pushed one of his legs between Kaoru's, causing Kaoru to whimper; it was the first sound he'd made during the entire -?

"H-Hikaru.." Kaoru breathed.

Hikaru smiled and leaned backward as though he were going to break the embrace, but instead, leaned forward, closing the final space between them again with a soft kiss.

It was over as quickly as it had started. Hikaru pulled back and away from his brother.

"Please don't forget that, Kaoru."

He walked out of the classroom, leaving Kaoru alone. Again.

Kaoru put a finger to the spot where his brother's lips had been. It had been so sudden, so unexpected. Nothing like how he'd imagined it.

Kaoru had never been so confused in his life. Hikaru had never pushed his actions that far. But for some reason, he had this time. What had been different?

He thought back to their earlier conversation. He hadn't really said much, just that he'd talked with-

Kyouya.

Kaoru blanched.

Was that what had set Hikaru off? The fact that he'd been with Kyouya?

'So that's it. He only acted like he wanted me because he was worried that someone else might have me. Figures.'

Kaoru felt himself tearing up again. He'd been doing that a lot lately.

He felt betrayed and lead on. It seemed like his life had become some kind of idiotic soap opera, where he was the pathetic lover, who'd just found out the ulterior motive of the relationship they were in. It was painful, to say the least.

Realizing he was about to be late, Kaoru dashed out the door and to his next class, his mind full of questions, maybe ones that would never be answered.

He was just about to mentally curse himself for his stupidity when Kyouya's voice popped into his head.

'Don't be too hard on yourself, okay?'

Kaoru sighed, remembering his promise, and walked silently to his next class, paying no attention to the fan girls who followed him incessantly. He had more important matters to focus on.

'Why Hikaru? Why?'

The rest of the school day passed rather uneventfully for Kyouya, and before he knew it, it was time to head over to Host Club.

He gathered all his things in complete silence, and walked absently through the halls. Before he even realized it, he had reached the ever famous (or infamous, depending on how you looked at it) Music Room Number 3.

Much to his surprise, Kyouya wasn't the first one there. Over in the far side of the room was a very distressed looking Kaoru staring out a large window.

"You're awfully early today Kaoru." Kyouya said with a hint of a smile playing over his lips.

Kaoru jumped slightly, as he had not heard Kyouya come into the room.

"Oh, Kyouya-senpai. You scared me." Kaoru said, his voice so soft that the words were almost inaudible.

Kyouya's face immediately became serious.

"Host Club doesn't start for another hour, what are you doing here?"

Kaoru glanced sheepishly at the ground.

"Well, I really needed some space to think, so I ditched last period and came here for awhile. It was the only place I could think of. The bathroom floor was alright, but I'd prefer to stay here, I think."

At this, Kyouya chuckled, recognizing the absurditiy of the situation they'd previously been in.

"Well, something's obviously on your mind, would you like to talk, or would you prefer to be left alone?"

Kaoru looked up at the older boy, still not used to this kinder, compassionate side of him, then glanced back out the window.

"I'm not sure my story's worth telling, Kyouya."

Kyouya took the seat across from Kaoru, resting his chin on one hand, and looked firmly into the younger boy's topaz eyes.

"I'm sure anything you have to say is worth listening to Kaoru."

Kaoru looked into Kyouya's eyes, searching for some sign of insincerity, but found none. He was telling the truth, he really did want to hear what Kaoru had to say. But why?

Kaoru let out a breath, not even realizing that he'd been holding it in the first place, as he prepares himself to tell Kyouya what he'd never told anyone before.

"It's a bit of a long story."

Kyouya leaned forward, and smiled at the auburn haired boy.

"We've got time, almost an hour. Go ahead and share."

Kaoru gave a small smile, "Alright. Let me know if I begin to bore you, or freak you out."

"You know, I don't even think that's possible Kaoru. With all the pranks you've pulled, I'd have to say you're one of least boring people I know. And I highly doubt you'll freak me out."

"Well thanks, but I guess I'm still not good enough, at least not in his eyes..."

Kyouya stared at Kaoru quizically.

"In whose eyes?"

Kaoru gazed distantly out the window again.

"In Hikaru's. He.. He doesn't seem to want me anymore. The only person he wants is Haruhi. I can't even express to you how much I regret forcing him to own up to his feelings with her, because in the long run, all it did was hurt me. He doesn't even know how much I care about him anymore, he-he doesn't even know."

Kaoru felt hot tears burning behind his eyes and looked down at the table in an attempt to hide them.

When he spoke again, he found his voice wavering, not strong the way it normally was.

"Its obvious he wants her, but At times he'll pretend that he loves me, in an, um, slightly different way, coming on to me, holding me, caressing me. Like today after class—"

Kaoru stopped talking abruptly, his face flushing immensley as he realized what he'd been about to reveal.

Kyouya looked concernedly down at Kaoru.

"Today after class...?" he prompted.

Kaoru turned an even darker shade of red and avoided eye contact at all costs.

"He kissed me. " He said in a quiet, scared voice. "I'd just told him about our little encounter, you see, and it made me wonder if he was only reacting to the fact that I'd opened up to someone other than him. I don't know. It was, kind of stupid. I was just trying to leave without talking to him, because I wasn't in the mood. Anyway, before I even knew what had happened, he had me up against the wall, I couldn't even move, but it's almost like I didn't want to. I don't know if it's what I wanted or not. Hikaru was kind of... rough."

Kyouya's eyebrows shot up. That had caught him by surprise. He knew Hikaru and Kaoru had homosexual tendencies, but toward eachother? He hadn't quite been prepared for that. Kyouya had always expected that the Hitachiin's "forbidden love" game was nothing more than that. A game. A show they put on for the adoring fans of the Host Club. Then again, this was one sided. Only Kaoru had any feelings toward his brother. The feeling wasn't mutual.

Something twinged inside Kyouya. A slight anger of sorts. How could Hikaru just sit there and watch his brother deteriorate this way, especially when it was because of him?

"But then, he spent the rest of the day flirting with Haruhi, like nothing had ever happened. What the hell is he trying to say to me?" Kaoru's voice broke on the last word. He couldn't believe he'd just told Kyouya all of that; Kyouya, the most unforgiving, cool-mannered, blackmail-y person he knew. Yet strangely enough, a part of him said it was okay, that Kyouya could be trusted. That part of him wanted to stand up to his brother, to tell him to stop jerking around with his emotions. But it was a small part of him. Not large enough to act on his wishes.

Kyouya looked down, and discovered that Kaoru was crying. It broke his heart to see the younger boy in this state, and once again, the kinder side of him took over. Kyouya got out of his seat and knelt down next to Kaoru, taking his face in both hands. He wiped the younger boy's tears and gazed into his eyes.

"Kaoru, listen to me. You've done nothing wrong. It's your brother who's at fault here, leading you on that way. He's only trying to hold you back from having your own experiences, trying to overpower you! Please Kaoru, you've got to see that."

Kyouya looked desperately into Kaoru's eyes, hoping that his words were getting through. Kaoru looked back at him, and slowly shook his head.

"That's not possible Kyouya. I'm always the one at fault. Hikaru? Hikaru is perfect. Just ask any of our teachers or our parents. Hikaru is always just a little better than me in every way possible. That's why I can't believe you Kyouya, there just isn't any way you could be right. It just isn't logical."

Kyouya couldn't bear to listen to him for another second. He couldn't believe that Kaoru's vision was so skewed, that he really thought of himself that way. It was wrong. Kaoru didn't feel loved and Kyouya could understand that, seeing as how his own brothers treated him as nothing more than a casual fuck, it took quite a toll on his self esteem for sure But Kyouya didn't want to sit there and watch Kaoru fall to pieces.

He wasn't sure why he did what he did next; he supposed his instincts took over, or maybe, it wasn't his subconscious but his own conscious mind that told him to do it.

In one swift motion, Kyouya pulled Kaoru's face down to his and captured his lips in a sweet kiss.

Kaoru's eyes widened in surprise, but he didn't pull away. Kyouya's lips were soft and inviting, and after a short moment Kaoru leaned in, into the warmth and comfort, deeper into Kyouya.

Much to the surprise of both boys, it was Kyouya who was the first to pull away. He looked into Kaoru's eyes, almost lovingly.

"You are not worthless, Kaoru." he said quietly. He drew his hands back, stood up and made to walk out of the room when Kaoru stood up suddenly and grabbed his hand.

"Kyouya," he started.

The dark haired boy pushed up his glasses and looked back expectantly.

"I know you probably only did all that out of pity, but thank you. For listening and.. just for everything."

Kyouya looked sadly at Kaoru. He didn't think he'd gotten through at all.

"Kaoru, I can assure you I didn't do it out of pity. Trust me, that's the last emotion I feel."

Kaoru blushed and peeked back up at Kyouya from under his bangs.

At that moment Hikaru came strolling in, shockingly, without Haruhi.

He glanced around the room, his eyes resting on Kyouya and Kaoru.

"Oh, not interupting anything am I?" he said somewhat coldly.

Kyouya realized that Kaoru still had a hold of his hand and gently let it go.

He responded to Hikaru with an even tone, having regained his typical "Shadow King" composure.

"We were just talking, not that it's any business of yours. So, where is Haruhi? I would've thought she'd have been with you, Hikaru."

Hikaru smiled, oblivious to the blatant sarcasm in Kyouya's voice., or perhaps he was... amused by it?

"Well, we have been getting a lot closer, that's true," he walked over to Kaoru and slung an arm around his shoulder.

"But she'll never replace my little brother." As he said this, he looked pointedly at Kyouya, almost as if he were warning him, but the smile never once left his face.

Kaoru said nothing, but glanced at his brother from the corner of his eye.

Hikaru grinned back at Kaoru and winked seductively, as though to imply there was something intimate between them though they both knew nothing had actually happened.

Kaoru had just opened his mouth to speak when Hikaru suddenly began walking away, dragging him along.

"Hey Kao-chan," Hikaru said, drawing out each syllable of the nickname unnecessarily. "We need to talk later, there's something I've been meaning to talk with you about. I would've told you earlier, but since you skipped last period..." he left the sentence hanging, once again making Kaoru the one at fault.

"Or, you know, we could just talk now. Come on."

Kaoru glanced back at Kyouya one last time before his brother pulled him out of the room.

Kyouya stared after the twins for a minute before he sighed and sat down. He rubbed his temples, still not fully grasping what had just happened. Had he just... kissed Kaoru?

He shook his head to clear it and wondered aloud.

"What am I getting myself into?"


End file.
